Everything Amounted To Nothing Except…

Everything Amounted To Nothing Except…

About one a.m. on Advent Sunday morning, I had a bad asthmatic attack. In my helplessness, I cried out to God to speak to me. I’m not very good at listening to God, but between one and three a.m. God spoke to me so powerfully and painfully that I have never felt so broken before him, and still do.

He showed me that all my preaching, writing and other ministry was absolutely nothing compared to my love-relationship with him. In fact, my sheer busyness had squeezed out the close intimacy I had known with him during the first few months of the year after my operation.

God also showed me that any ‘love’ for him meant nothing unless I was truly able to love from my heart my brother or sister in Christ. As the Lord put various names into my mind, I began to write letters to about twelve people, asking for forgiveness for hurting them, for still being inwardly angry against them – or whatever. It was the most painful pruning and purging I can remember in my entire Christian life. But fruitful! Already, some replies to my letters have reduced me to tears.

David Watson, 1984.